Marketing is by all means an industry. It is one purpose built to sell you something, and there can be a degree of, let’s call it, practiced misdirection aspart of that. That said, the people who make these adverts are then usually given a bit more free reign to make something memorable. And sometimes, you could get an add that was really genuinely interesting.
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That, however, was not the vast majority of gaming adverts .Not because of the cynical side of marketing even, but just because they were so bizarre to the point of shock value. And to be completely honest, most of them were engaged more in the culture of the time rather than the product they were selling. Funny in hindsight, though bizarre to look back on. These ones, at least, are the ones I can remember, from a very different time in gaming.
8 Practice Your Mental Wealth
Scottish People Are Aliens, Apparently
Back in 1999, PlayStation was on a role with bizarre ads, carrying ahead the PS1 and highlighting the out-of-this-world power of the PS2. That part was intended to be literal, by the way. This ad featured a young girl just talking about ‘mental wealth’ and how you really shouldn’t underestimate the power of the PS2. And also something about landing on moons.
She also, rather notably, had a very modified head that gave it a rather bulbous shape with eyes stretched to the sides. The ad did not acknowledge this as unusual, among the many unusual acts in the video. It honestly makes it seem like Scottish people are just like that.
For the record, Scottish people aren’t, in fact, like that.
7 More Fun Than A Ferret Down Your Pants
A Ferret Down Your Pants Would Be Rather Unfun!
Really, the 90s were a very bizarre period where just about anything could go. And a lot of that was machismo and sexism, but sometimes it really was just weird things that had no grip on reality. Even Nintendo took part in all this back then, an oddity compared to the company’s squeaky-clean presentation now.
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For example, playing a Game Boy was apparently much more fun than a ferret down your pants. I would like to think so! Maybe I’m the weird one here, but I’ve never seen a ferret and thought “wow, it would be such fun if they were down my pants”. No, that would be weird, and likely very painful. But sure, I suppose the Game Boy would, comparatively, be quite fun.
6 Dante’s Inferno’s Everything
EA Literally Paid People To Call The Company The Anti-Christ
In the purest sense, Dante Alighieri’s Divine Comedy is fan-fiction. He enlists the ad of the legendary Roman poet Vergil to guide the main character, also called Dante. Later is Beatrice, a woman likely inspired by someone Dante actually knew. And then finally is Saint Bernard of Clairvaux, co-founder of the Knights Templar. It was an oddly self-indulgent affair for a work held in such high prestige
Which is what makes Dante’s Inferno, the game, so bizarre. Everything about it was blood and violence and death and in and really nothing Divine Comedy whatsoever. And it had a lot of weird ads. But the strangest of all was EA hiring people to protest the game and call it sinful. They also sent out lots of marketing packages basically calling you greedy for cashing a cheque.
The fake protest also upset actual religious groups, resulting in real protests. Ironic!
5 Welcome To The Third Space
No, David Lynch Didn’t Know What A PS2 Was
David Lynch created so many fascinating works, ones that were delighted to exist on the edge of actually being understood, and purely thematic. And among the wonderful oddities of his work were just incredible framing and sets, and some truly out there special effects. So it was indeed quite a big deal for him to come along and make an ad just for the PS2.
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And you know, in hindsight, it almost feels like a teaser for Twin Peaks: the Return. The black-and-white, the ‘third space’, the Black Lodge. Odd arms. Lots of stuff. I don’t know that it really sold the PS2 as a console to me, but it definitely got me more interested in the works of David Lynch, even if none of it really meant anything to me as a child.
4 PlayStation Condoms
At least One Of Them Might Be Effective
Notably, this article is about ads I recall from my childhood. You see, gaming, despite being prevalently advertised towards adults, was also mainly see as a children’s activity. And so all those gaming magazines I collected were jam-jacked with things I really should not have been seeing as a child. Lots of scantily-clad women offering me cheat codes for no reason other than eye-candy and ye olde sexism.
So I can tell you firmly that advertising condoms to me, when I was like four? An odd choice, by all means. Also just looking at them in the picture above, they seem hardly intuitive. I don’t want to imagine the sensation of an X-shaped condom. At last this ad actually ties back to the PlayStation, which is something.
3 Rayman’s Package
I Never Really Thought About Rayman’s Limbs Before
I loved Rayman when I was younger. The very first one I actualy played was Rayman 3: Hoodlum Havoc. Really liked it as a child, felt, well, child-friendly. So colour me shocked when I later saw so much of the advertising around the game. Either I do not remember the game very well, or these ads severely misadvertised the game!
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Rayman has the funny floating body parts! There is nothing that needs to be said about his ‘huge features’. That’s weird! I liked the funny claw hands you could get in the game, I have never once put thought to any hidden limbs he had. So you know, the only hoodlum in all this is rayman himself in those ads, or whoevcer decided to make them.
2 Play Beyond Baby
Nothing Sells Your Console Like An Unsettling Plastic Baby
Amidst many sexist or hyper-masculine ads focused solely around men, you get some truly astounding adverts. Once you step away from the tried-and-tested ads of old, you get into a new age of marketing. The PS3 was a new era, a machine so expensive it had to be justified. And the best way of doing that? With a very creepy, very isolated plastic baby.
The ad is only like 30 seconds, and I had not seen it in many years until today, and I was left feeling rather uncomfortable. The baby just sits there, staring at the PS3 as it begins to levitate, and starts making odd noises, as if it were receiving radio signals. Tears spill and then return to their ducts. It seemed funny without sound, but like I’d stepped into some eldritch oddity with it on. I feel like I’m a sleeper agent for something now.
1 Life Is Too Short
And Somehow, This Ad Was Too Long
So this one is a bit of a cheat because I saw it for the very first time only a few years ago. However, I do have a rather good excuse for that. The ad was purpose-built to advertise the original Xbox in Europe, though it had a bit of backlash in how it depicted pregnancy death, and was subsequently banned from airing on television.
The ad itself shows a woman giving birth with such force (and medical negligence) that the baby shoots through the window and flies through the sky, aging through his whole life as he goes until he crash lands into his own grave. I’m…not really sure how this advertises the Xbox. Life is too short, make sure you play the Xbox before you go? Try to give birth in a more controlled manner so your child has a chance to play Xbox? Anyone’s guess.
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